It's been a while and my eyes got fat

Ok, so it's been a while...about a month and a half since I last posted. Due mostly to messages left on my facebook, it's time to cough up the details. And oh do I have so much to tell you. I'll start with the ultrasound visit where we found out, as my grandpa puts it, if we get to buy a train set or a doll. He has been waiting about 30 years so far to buy a train set, poor guy.

So this ultrasound was at the Concord office instead of my usual Harrisburg office because my ultrasound tech is on maternity leave...which is kind of funny. Hunter, of course, came with me and we sat in the waiting room for probably about two minutes but it felt like an hour because at this point I'm still telling him how pink I am going to decorate the room and he keeps telling me that everything is going to be about footballs or something. So FINALLY they call us back and as we are walking to the ultrasound room with this person I have never seen before in my life, I ask her if I can go to the bathroom first because all of a sudden I have to pee like right now. And this is how that went...

"No."
"Wait. What? I really can't go?"
"No."
Then I pause because seriously, what am I supposed to say here?
"We can see the baby a lot better if your bladder is full."

Two things: number one, that is just cruel to a pregnant woman. Let's lay you on your back with a full bladder for about 30 minutes or so and push on your belly, mostly the part over your full, unforgiving and abused bladder. And two, I am so sure she told me no twice with no explanation. I thought it was against the law to tell a pregnant woman she can't pee. It's against my law anyway.

At this point, we are being ushered in through the doorway of the ultrasound room and there is so much anticipation between Hunter and I (mostly on who is right about the sex) that I almost feel like the baby is going to leap out of my belly, say, "I'm a _____" and pop right back on in. Surprisingly, this doesn't happen, so I heave my body up on the table and roll my pants down so a strange lady can put strange goo all over my belly and push on my bladder.

She starts probing around and, of course, finds the baby immediately. And he moves immediately. And then moves again, and again and so on. She seems surprised but I'm trying to explain to her that this always happens while trying to use adjectives like "active" so she will understand that this is just how it's going to be. Finally the baby settles down just enough so she can start pointing out things.

"You see this right here?" She points at the screen.
I'm thinking, 'Oh my gosh, that's the vagina!'
"That's the stomach."
Not even close. Then, a few seconds later...

"You see this right here?" She again, points at the screen.
I think, 'Ohhh. There's the vagina.'
"That's a kidney."
I think, 'Ok funny lady, enough with the jokes.'

She does this several more times. At this point I think I am going to explode if she doesn't hurry up and tell us what the heck it is already. Then, finally, she says. "Do you want to know what it is?" You have got to be kidding me. Now she knows and I know she knows and she hasn't said yet. What a tease.

We both said "Yes" so quickly and with probably a bit too much force that I think we scared her. Then she types on the screen, "It's a" and stops. "Are you sure you want to know?" I am seriously going to freak out at this point. She smiles, like this is supposed to be fun or something and finishes typing so now the screen reads, "It's a boy!" I see the letter 'b' and start crying immediately. I think Hunter said, "Yes!" but I'm not really sure because at this point I'm a bit delirious because she has been hardcore pushing on my bladder for about 20 minutes, teasing me with information I have wanted since I found out I was pregnant, and my little girl is now a little boy which makes me have to rethink things. I immediately feel like I should start eating a steak or something. I have no idea what to do with boys. But of course, I'm totally thrilled. I just don't know what to do with a boy.

Ok, so equally as great as finding out that I was right all along and it's totally a boy....after I wiped the goo off my belly and heaved myself off the table...I head right for the bathroom. Being that this office is full of pregnant women, the bathroom is occupied. Of course. I'm waiting, and glance to my right to see a doctor on the phone in the hallway. I glance at his name badge and guess what it says folks? Dr. Beaver. OH MY GOSH. I totally ran in to Dr. Beaver on the day of the best ultrasound of my entire pregnancy. What perfect day.

And now for part two....

I had a routine eye appointment the other day because my contacts ran out and my prescription was up and since I've gotten used to seeing, this is what must be done. It was a new eye doctor because I haven't been since we moved to Harrisburg. Naturally, I look up the closest doctor in the health care provider's directory and book the appointment there.

Have you ever seen the first Men in Black with Will Smith? You know the part where he is being 'tested' to work for the government and he has to answer questions in that chair that looks like a giant egg? And everything is all awkward and he drags that table across the room and it screeches the entire way? This is pretty much what it was like to fill out my paperwork at my eye doctor's office. But instead of a huge room, it was tiny (I don't know how my belly and I both fit in the waiting room). And instead of pulling a table across the room to write on because there wasn't a table or room enough to pull anything across anything, I got to sit in a chair with arms that came up to the middle of my upper arm. This meant that the clipboard and my arms couldn't both fit in the bounds of the chair at the same time (and I felt like a midget) so I got to rest the clipboard on one of the decorative knobs of the arm of the chair. Have you ever tried to balance a marble on the tip of a pen? That is pretty much what it was like.

While I am struggling to fill out my family medical history, the lady I gave my insurance card to comes into the waiting room (well, really halfway in the waiting room and halfway in the back part) and places my card on my lap and lets me know she is done with it. Are you kidding? That couldn't have waited another two minutes? So now I am trying to avoid letting the card fall off my lap because I can't really pick things off the floor with much ease or grace these days and balance the rotating clipboard while trying not to write like a five year old.

The rest of the visit was normal except after she sized me for my contacts, she told me that the curve of my eyes had changed. Considering I stopped growing sometime in late middle school, I thought this was odd and gave her an appropriately puzzled look.

"Well...you are pregnant, aren't you?"

Up until this point there had been no mention of the bun in the oven whatsoever. Not by the doctor, not by the receptionist. Which is odd, because at this point I am so obviously pregnant (I mean I had to heave myself out of that terrible chair when the doctor came to get me) that nearly everywhere I go people are constantly asking when my due date is and the like. So for about half a second, I stare at her and respond with a, "Yes?". It really did sound like I was questioning myself because this was such an odd question for the enormity of my belly.

Then she went on to explain that this can happen when you are pregnant because of all the hormones and basically my eyes have swollen a bit but not that I would have noticed and it should go back to normal about 6 months after I give birth. That, to me, seems like an incredibly long time to have fat eyes. So now I have shrunken brain cells and fat eyes. What the heck. And if I haven't told you about the brain cell thing, I will now because I can't remember because apparently they are shrunken.

I read in "What to Expect When You Are Expecting" that somewhere around the start of your pregnancy, some of your brain cells will shrink and expand back the the normal size about 6 months after you give birth. I don't remember why and I don't remember which cells because mine are small now. All I know is this seems like kind of an important time to have fully functioning brain cells at their full and proper size.

And, when I was leaving, I heard the receptionist typing. On a typewriter. A real one. Like 'tick tick tick tick tick, ding! The end.

Busy Little Beaver

So last night was one of those nights where I didn't sleep very well. Apparently the baby doesn't sleep at night so I'm not allowed to either. haha. My cell phone rang shortly after nine am which was totally annoying because I had just fallen back asleep. I ignored it out of spite then laid there for about five minutes wondering who it was. Even more totally annoyed, I grabbed my phone and called my voicemail. It went something like this:

"Hey, Samantha. This is Michelle from Dr. Beaver's office." I'm thinking, 'this has got to be good and why is his name still Dr. Beaver?'. "I was calling to see if you could come in earlier for your appointment today because Dr. Beaver got called into surgery." 'How many times can they say his name in the span of several seconds?' "Give me a call back as soon as you can."

Now I'm up. Wouldn't want to miss out on a chance to see Dr. Beaver in action, now would I? So I call them back and tell them I can be there in about an hour then proceed to rush getting ready. I get there about an hour and fifteen minutes later (which is pretty good considering the dog took her sweet time going to the bathroom before I left). I walked up to the desk, gave her my name and in response she says, "He already left." The busy little Beaver left before I could get there. For the next couple of seconds I debate in my head if I want to leave and go back to bed even though I am totally awake at this point or...."Is there anyone else who can see me?" So she checks and my midwife can "squeeze" me in. Interesting choice of words.

I wait around for a little while, getting some good book reading in before I do the standard weigh in (I gained two pounds, not bad) and pee in a cup (which I feel like a pro at now). Then they send me to the room to wait for my midwife. When she comes in she asks me the usual questions, tells me everything looks good and has me lay down for the Doppler so she can measure the heart beat. Well apparently my child is an acrobat. The little one was moving around and twisting and everything else so much she couldn't even get a blip of a heart beat on the Doppler. So she sent me to the ultrasound room. TOTALLY awesome. My baby just got me an extra ultrasound peek. SO sweet. Way to go, kid. You rock already.

The usual technician is on maternity leave so one of the assistants got to do it. She was so fantastic. She let me stay in there so long just watching the baby do flips all over my belly, kick, twist, squirm and even wave. Then she printed like ten pictures which was the greatest thing ever because the first time I got two. We were in there so long that my midwife got nervous that something was wrong so she came in, too. It was so cool to see her get excited about the show that the baby was putting on. Then we all watched some more and saw the heart beat (which looked totally fine) but the baby still wouldn't let us measure it because apparently constant flips and twirls in mommy's stomach is way more fun than chilling out for a minute. And it's not my fault. The baby makes me eat candy.

The assistant technician (or assistant to the technician for The Office fans out there) tried to see if it was a boy or a girl but couldn't tell. Thank God because if she could tell then I totally would have had her tell me which is not fun because Hunter wasn't there. So we will have to wait two more weeks for that one. It's OK though because today was the best visit ever.

Here are six of the ultrasound pictures along with my lovely descriptions.

Position #1: looking right at ya

This is what I lovingly call the Skeletor picture. The baby is on its side starring right at us. You can see the eye sockets, cheek bones and mouth. It totally looks like a skeleton which they tell me is normal. You can also see the spine running along the top of the back. The arms and legs are flailing around somewhere.

Position #2: facing away and twisting around

Just a back view of the baby. You can see the back of the head and the back. Also, it looks like the baby is resting its head on a pillow in my uterus. What the heck is that thing?

Position #3: Your guess is as good as mine

I did have them tell me what everything was before I left but there are so many pictures. I think this is a back view with an arm on the side.

Position #4: The bottom

Check out that glorious butt. We still couldn't see what the sex is yet but you can see a foot on either side of the body and just for fun, a kidney.

Position #5: Side view

This is almost what Hunter looks like when he's in his hammock in the man room. Is that weird? The head is somewhere to the left, the baby is laying on its back with its feet propped up and crossed over. This baby appears to be totally chillin' but actually it was a brief pause in the acrobats we witnessed.

Position #6: Bird's eye view

This is the top of the head where you can see the brain because everything is still very translucent which is not creepy at all. At least less creepy than Skeletor.









And that concludes the 16 week slide show. In two weeks I get the sex determining ultrasound and two weeks after that I have another regular visit. But not with Dr. Beaver. Apparently he's too busy for me. This time I get Dr. Barefoot. At least that's better than Beaver.

I can't seem to stop

I have gone absolutely crazy with getting the house ready. The man room has been revamped, the nursery is nearly cleared out, crafting projects are underway and the house gets clean practically from top to bottom every day. Pretty much, I am amazing. Also, I get to see Dr. Beaver next week.

The man room used to basically look like this:

OK so maybe I am exaggerating a little bit. But just a little. There were boxes, bins and chests scattered all over the place, most of it having been dug through so there were also piles of stuff everywhere, and a very skinny pathway to walk around in the front half of the room.

But after a few weeks of my awesome hubby helping out, we went through everything and consolidated and organized and made room for my craft table. This allows me to keep the cats from eating the fake berries off of the fall wreath I am making for the front door.

So now the man room looks like this:

There is no question that it is still a man room. Example: the hammock. Which by the way, is totally awesome and comfortable. And there are still piles of stuff but now that doesn't include trash and everything is grouped into sections so stuff can be put away. That's Hunter's desk in the back corner.

That's my craft table in the back corner. The hammock doesn't usually stay out like that. Hunter takes down one side and hangs it up on the wall so we can actually walk in the middle of the room.

So now that we can utilize the man room, I went a little crazy with the nursery. That room had basically turned into the junk room. There were an unbelievable amount of random things on top of the air hockey table (I had no idea it could be used as a real table but it totally was), there was a big file cabinet in the closet which was overrun with papers just everywhere, games in the entire top part of the closet and random I don't know what in every crevice of the room. It basically looked like the disaster fairy stopped by and brought his friend Mr. Tornado. And then they had a wild party.

But as of tonight, it looks like this:

So now the only things that need to be removed are the air hockey table (which is going downstairs), the ceiling fans we have left to put up (which are going in the garage), and the kitty litter boxes (which I would like to get rid of but obviously can't)....and all courtesy of my husband. I love delegating. It's awesome.

The belly bump is getting bigger and I will post pictures of that soon. We just have to remember to do it when Hunter is home. That's the trick. I will also post pics of the crafty things I am making and the sweet pumpkins we carved last night. Next week: Dr. Beaver, OB/GYN.

And the doppler says....

So today was my second prenatal visit of my whole life. And it was pretty good, I might add. I got to keep my clothes on which is always a bonus, I lost two pounds (and not due to throwing up praise GOD) which is actually good because there was some weight to loose when I got preggers, and I got to hear the heartbeat which is always exciting.

She started out her part of the appointment (by this time I had waited, been weighed, then peed...you think they would let me pee first to give me an edge but whatever) by asking various questions. I think she was basically trying to find out if there was still a baby in there and how sick I had been. So I let her know (by answering her series of questions) that there is, indeed, still a healthy baby living inside of me and I had not actually gotten sick.

Then I turned the tables and said, "I'll be asking the questions, lady." Ok, not really but that sounds kind of cool. But I did ask her questions...after she saw I had a notepad out and asked if I had them. She was totally in charge the whole time....which I guess is good because if I was in charge, I would walk in, look in a mirror and say, "Yep, I look pretty good and huge." And that would be the end of my appointment. But I digress. So back to my questions...they were either too boring or personal to post for all the world to see (or maybe just my fanatical sorority sisters and three family members who actually read this) but the most important question of all: is it still possible for there to be twins? Because I seriously think there are two babies in there.

Which brings me to the next event of the morning. This time there was no ultrasound but they did use the doppler which was cool and weird at the same time. My midwife spread the jelly looking stuff on my belly and then proceeded to probe the areas where the baby could be nesting. So odd. But then I heard the heartbeat and it's so fast...162 beats per minute I think is what she said. And it was as far on my right side as it could possibly be. Then she probed around a lot more and we heard my heartbeat...in two places...the baby's again and nothing else. So alas, I am with only one child.

As cool as it would be to have twins, I am so relieved that there is only one the first go around because I was really starting to panic. All at once I realized that I had no idea how to equally give my undivided attention to both babies at once, two babies means two of everything, two high chairs, two cribs, etc, and how am I supposed to feed both babies at once? It was too much considering I have no idea what I am doing. So I am very glad there is only one this time. Although I do want twins in a later pregnancy...because I can totally control that and everything.

So I asked my midwife why I was so humongous. She told me I wasn't (ok, yeah right) then said it's just how I'm made and all the baby living is pushing all of my insides up and out so that is why my belly is bigger than what it would be just for the baby itself. Also, the baby is about the size of a large lime, I am at 12 weeks right now and am supposed to be able to feel movements around 16-18 weeks. The baby is constantly moving but it's not big enough for me to feel that yet. Also, it is pushing everything up into my right ribs. That doesn't sound comfortable because it's not.

I got a lot of details on the labor and delivery like what hospital, what the rooms are like, etc. And next visit (in four weeks) I start the cycle of going through each of the doctors because my midwife has a different certification that doesn't allow her to actually deliver. Soooo sad. So now I get to choose a dude which is weird for me but I guess when that day comes I won't really care who is there as long as someone is helping me get it out. And the best ending note of the blog so far: when I went to set my next appointment, I told them I didn't care who I saw first so she set me up with Dr. Beaver. NOT kidding. Beaver, you guys. Dr. Beaver, OB/GYN.

Mrs. Crafty McGafty

Ok, so nothing that has anything to do with crafts rhymes with West but what I am trying to convey is I have been bit mega big time by the crafting bug. And the bug is ginormous. The past three or four days have been glorious. I am in the last week of the first trimester (week 11) and all of the terrible nauseous things and lack of any energy whatsoever have completely left town. Thank God. Seriously. I am now able to eat like a normal person (almost) and I have my energy back! Hooray! Now I can actually be a productive member of society again...and also of my house. And that's where the crafting comes in.

I am so stinkin' pumped about all of the fantastic crafty things I am going to make to decorate my house. I literally spent about 6 hours on Joann's.com yesterday getting ideas and learning about the different tools you need for everything. Then I bought a bunch of stuff that will be here mid next week. Then I went to Michael's today to get something to keep me busy in the meantime and filled that tiny little cart up to the brim. It. Was. Awesome.

Also, since I have given up my craft room for the nursery (kind of important) Hunter said I could share his man room until we get another house. How sweet is that. However, it will still be called the man room. I'm cool with that though. Tonight we are going to start setting up in there because it is still full of boxes, bins and miscellaneous odd items that have been randomly taken out of said containers. He is such a great husband! And we finally get to use the random table we have had for several months that had no purpose. Now it has an awesome purpose- a crafting purpose. Most excellent.

Well that's pretty much it for now. I will post pictures as I complete the incredibly sweet projects that are stewing in my now active brain. The next prenatal visit is a week from today and hopefully they will do another ultrasound so we can find out for sure if there are twins in there. I am still convinced. Even more now that I can feel the hardness of the growing uterus and it is not just in the middle, but across from hip to hip....which would be about the right size for twins. So there ya go. Also, I will post pictures of the belly bump soon...well, at some point before I give birth.

Much Needed Update...

So sorry for the delay in getting the info up on the baby. There are a lot of people out there hunting me down with torch in hand so I figured I better get this put up because I enjoy my unburned skin. As you can see, we got two sonogram pictures of our beautiful baby...I don't care if it looks like an alien. It is still beautiful. The sonogram lady said at that point I was 8 weeks along so now I am working on the ninth week and there is only one baby. This caused me to go to my midwife, very confused, and ask why I am ginormous and can't wear normal people clothes anymore and she said very simply, "Oh, you just put on a lot of water weight but it's normal and will go away." That is not nearly as much fun as twins but at least she didn't say I wasn't birthing a baby cow and to slow down on the food. Because seriously, if anyone told me to slow down on the food, I would probably eat their head. And I'm a pretty nice person. There is something about someone coming between me and the care of my child that makes me feel perfectly fine going loco. But anyway, we have one baby, folks. Count it: uno. And now to explain the pictures because I had no idea what any of it was either....

The top picture is an almost frontal view of the baby which I am going to go ahead and refer to her as a girl because that's what I feel like she is. The top of her head is near the top of the picture and her unformed feet are at the bottom. To be more specific, the big black oval in the middle is the amniotic fluid and the white lima bean shape on the right of it is the actual baby. Then start at the top for the head and work your way down. The second picture, our favorite, is a side view of our beautiful little girl. This time she is on the left side of the big, black, circle/oval thing but her head is still at the top with her facing right this time.

There have only been three times in my life where time seemed to stop and I could not hear the world around me (at least briefly). The first was when Hunter so incredibly proposed with about 20,000 people watching and caught me completely off guard (which is hard to do). The second was when I was walking down the aisle at our wedding and the third was when I heard my baby's heartbeat. That was the most incredible thing I have ever experienced. I forgot that I was supposed to be lying down and tried to sit up to see the screen better and I vaguely remember the sonogram lady telling me to try to be as still as possible. It was 152 beats per minute of incredibleness. I could never forget that sound....I don't even think the memory of it can fade at all.

That's pretty much it for right now. Except none of my shirts fit which is adorable so I am constantly shopping and I am REALLY looking forward to the end of first trimester (in about 3 weeks) so odd smells won't make me want to spontaneously vomit. That will be nice.

Tomorrow, tomorrow....

The first sonogram of my whole entire life is TOMORROW. Hello. Less than 24 hours away. I have a ridiculous amount of questions for my doctor such as...

What the heck is it?
How the heck far along am I?
How the heck many babies are in there?
Do you want to clean my house?
Am I supposed to feel this large at this point?
If I pretend to not know there is caffeine in chocolate, can I still have it on a regular basis?

There are a lot more questions but most of them are gross so I'll spare you. Every day I wake up, I have a list of about 800 things I actually expect myself to accomplish...completely on my own...with no help from anyone whatsoever...but I usually end up eating, doing one thing, then taking a nap. So needless to say, the list is absolutely ginormous right now and ranges from buying a footstool for the desk (so I can lean back slightly while typing so I can't feel my belly as much b/c it's weird and uncomfortable) to installing three more ceiling fans. Obviously my knight in shinning armor...or Hunter as I usually call him...will have to do the things like installing the fans. I tried to help him install one over the weekend but we need to put a brace up for it so it won't spontaneously fall out of the ceiling spraying dry wall and insulation everywhere so we did the smart thing. For the very first time since we have been here (and over a year, mind you) I decided to go up into the attic...while pregnant...during the summer. I never claimed to be a genius. Hunter went up first and I wanted to see so I followed. It was so hot I thought I was going to throw up, stop breathing, and the baby (or babies) was (or were) going to leap out of my stomach all at the same time. I immediately wanted to leave but was terrified to go back down because all of a sudden the ladder was much farther away than it was when I got myself in to the attic. So Hunter had to go down first and guide my huge butt down after him. Seriously, my butt is huge.

Anyway, we decided to get the brace you can shimmy into the ceiling from the room you want the fan in, not the attic and through several hundred feet of insulation. Also on the top of the list is new carpet in the nursery. The cats so lovingly decided to pee on that carpet so it and the padding needs to be replaced in there. I'll be sure to post pictures once we start working on the baby's room. But that won't be for a few months.

Looking forward to tomorrow where I found out exactly what is going on inside of me and how much of it....

Everything is getting bigger. Everything.

Until recently (like yesterday) I was under the terrible misconception that being pregnant would only involve changes in my belly: namely a cute little bump and the feeling of movement. Oh and I would get to eat everything I wanted. The reality of it is everything- hello seriously everything- decides to go along for the growing ride. My pillow even got bigger (upgraded from a normal person size to a humongous body pillow). When Hunter woke up this morning he said something like, "Did the bed feel crowded to you last night?" And it totally did. Not only are my husband and I sleeping in it, but the baby (and potentially babies) are along with this body pillow that takes up more room than I do. Also, our orange cat likes to sleep in the middle of us at night but now there is not room for her and she is so not happy about it. Eventually she finds a place anyway like Hunter's chest or in between my feet or legs. However, this ridiculously large pillow has TOTALLY revolutionized my sleeping patterns. Now I have something to support my growing belly and to shove between my legs when I can't stand them touching. Funny thing about that...when Hunter came home from work and saw the pillow he said exactly this: "You better put my face on that thing." Moving on...

My appetite is absolutely ridiculous. One minute I will be craving Cheez-its so I shove a few handfuls in my face and the next minute I feel like if I eat one more single cracker I will throw up everything I have ever eaten. I have NOT thrown up so far and really don't think I will. Praise the Lord! But there are still waves of such deliciousness that so lovingly come on me so I have to knock those bad boys right back down. Also, I absolutely have to have anything with potatoes. I could probably have four varieties of potatoes for dinner and be completely satisfied. Mmmm. Delicious.

So yesterday I went to Target for the huge pillow and a few maternity clothes. Despite being surrounded by every college student and their roommate searching for things to fill their dorm rooms, it felt totally normal buying clothes for my growing belly when it seriously looks just a little fat instead of a little pregnant. Totally normal. I got a couple of pairs of jeans- PRAISE GOD- because my other jeans made me want to vomit when I zipped them up. And I totally used to make fun of the stretchy band at the top of maternity pants but now I am undeniably grateful to whomever invented that wonderful piece of gloriousness. It is so unbelievably comfortable that there just aren't words great enough for it in the English language. I also got a few shirts...but not maternity shirts because they fit me like Hunter's robe would fit our fat cat. Which would be not at all. I had to revert to the regular section with all of the sorority girls (not even joking- they were everywhere) carrying their purses with no problem and holding about 1,200 pounds of clothes in one hand while browsing with the other. My cute self, on the other hand, had to push a cart because my purse is entirely too heavy to carry now without getting fatigued and I somehow no longer have the capability to browse for clothes AND hold them at the same time. I would seriously need a nap about every 10 minutes. Insane. So with my purse where the baby goes and two pairs of maternity pants draped on top of them with the elastic band proudly showing, I shoved my cart through the teeny aisles and navigated around sorority girl after sorority girl to find three shirts that I could wear in a bigger size without looking fat but actually look sort of pregnant.

Once I was finished with the clothes escapade, I headed off to find a new light bulb for our fridge (because ours inconveniently burned out- the nerve) and for a huge pillow so I could hopefully sleep through the night and only wake up when my bladder decides it's time. Then all of a sudden I became extremely weak and hungry at the same time. Well, I hadn't eaten for at least 30 minutes so I really should have expected it. Crimeny. So I finish shopping as quickly as possible, this time navigating around a ton of freshmen guys, all with their roommates, all wearing brand new, dark green, UNCC shirts. By the time I got to the car, I was rapidly loosing motivation to continue moving. It started to sound really good to just take a nap in my car until Hunter could get off work and bring me some food...in the form of potatoes. But I'm an over comer so I left the plaza and got all the way to the light...right where I could see the McDonald's across the street but not get to it. I thought I was going to pass out. Doesn't the traffic light system know I'm pregnant? Seriously. Once I finally got through the drive-thru and asked for the biggest fry they could give me...and a sprite because that sounded so freaking good...I shoved that whole box of fries down my throat so fast that the last fry was as hot as the first glorious fried piece of potatoey goodness. By then I was about five minutes from passing the next McDonald's and about 10 minutes from home. And I was still hungry. So I pulled through the second drive-thru of the half hour- I sure did- and ordered another huge fry, a medium sprite and a double cheeseburger (you know, for the protein). I ripped that burger out of it's package so fast it didn't know what hit it. Then I devoured the entire thing in about 35 seconds praising God the entire time for food. A few minutes later I was home and was so exhausted that I had to lay on the couch and rest until Hunter came home from work about half and hour later. I guzzled down most of that Sprite but didn't even touch the fries because they would have made me vomit. Doesn't make any sense. And now I am very tired again so I have to go rest. And probably eat. Then rest again from all the eating.

Samsonite? I was way off!

So I've been telling everyone...seriously, everyone that my first sonogram is a week from today...Thursday the 21st. In my mind it totally was and all was good. Somehow though, reality stepped in for a bit and decided it would be Thursday SEPTEMBER 4th. Waaaaaaay different. It's been more than difficult to hold off these two weeks to find out exactly how far along I am. What's more than excruciating? Really, really ridiculously excruciating? Despite that last brain fart I really am good with words, I really did graduate with an English/Creative Writing degree and I really did teach kids how to read good and do other stuff good too....in a school at least three times the size of the one on Zoolander. Obviously. Anywho...it's been hard, ok?

So today I decided to do some expert research of my own and cross reference my symptoms with the main frame and hack into this bad boy....also, I googled. Seriously, what else was I supposed to do? So I found out from a website that looked pretty legitimate (don't judge me) that according to my symptoms (tight feeling belly, no weight gain but my pants don't button which is always cute, and mild cramping) that I am more likely about 9 or 10 weeks along right now instead of 6 or 7. Big diff. Mega big diff. This means that I seriously could be showing although only Hunter and I would be able to tell and I need to start doing certain things differently like wearing those sweet elastic banded pants.

I was trying to ignore the fact that my pants wouldn't button comfortably because I thought I was getting fat. Ha ha. Seriously though, I thought I was getting fat. But whenever I would push through the pain like a champ (because, as we all know, there is no crying in baseball...or in wearing tight pants) I would feel so nauseous I really thought I was going to throw up. For real. And not like an 'oh man I don't feel good- maybe this is not a good idea" type of sick. I mean a straight up "if I don't unbutton my pants immediately I am going to hurl all over the place". And I haven't thrown up since second grade so this is kind of a big deal. No, really, it's a big deal. My middle little sister and I have a contest. She hasn't thrown up since first grade but she is only 18 so I'm still ahead. I must win. Other than the tight pants thing, I haven't gotten nauseous so it's looking pretty good.

So back to the main thought here...I was forced to go to the mall and buy big 'ole stretchy pants. It wasn't a good feeling since I was told I am probably at the stage of pregnancy where the baby is the size of a small grape so there ain't no way I'd be showin' yet. But it has GOT to be, like I said, more along the 9 or 10 week point where my uterus (delicious word and consequently very comfortable for most guys to hear) is more like the size of a grapefruit so it's very possible I would be showing a tiny bit. Also, did you know that the Gap has a maternity line? How sweet is that? I totally ordered two pairs of jeans. They will be here next week.

So the only mall near us is Concord Mills...a big outlet mall. I went into the Gap first because of my new found exciting knowledge and asked the girl if they have maternity clothes and I kid you not, she said, "Not anymore (casually glanced down at my belly)- sorry." Wow. That was a special moment. So the only other maternity option at that mall is on the exact opposite side which is about a six day hike. After a few meals and a couple of shaves for Hunter, we found Motherhood Maternity. Now, my first big mistake was that I thought it was a regular, run of the mill maternity store. Not that I really know what that is but still. So I walk in and start wondering around because everything I see is for HUGE bellies and I am just trying to get past the, "No, I'm not fat, I'm pregnant" stage. Finally, Hunter asks, "Do you know what you are doing?" Of course I do. How dare you. So I beeline it over to a girl stocking clothes and say, "Ok. I have no idea what I'm doing." She was really helpful but I did think it was odd that she was REALLY REALLY pushing the sale stuff and not telling me anything about the regular clothes. So I listened while she told me it would be a good idea to look at last season's fall clothes to prepare for next season...wouldn't that be two seasons old at that point?...and showed me the clearance rack while she explained that almost nothing is wrong with them and there is a final sale policy for this rack. Almost nothing wrong? Wait. What? I was totally looking forward to looking totally adorable in my maternity clothes and I already feel fat because that is what I look like right now and now I feel like I'm at Goodwill. This is weird. So I ended up trying on a few things in the dressing room. One pair of dress pants actually looked pretty good...they were from the regular racks...and they didn't make me have to throw up. So I considered it a winner. At this point, any pair of pants that looks halfway decent and doesn't make me have to barf is a golden ticket to happiness. The jeans I tried on felt like cardboard and I'm pretty sure the detailing on the back pockets was picked off so I didn't get those. But I ended up with 1 pair of casual pants, two pairs of dress pants, a dress shirt and a weird tube thing that I can wear with regular jeans and leave them unbuttoned. I don't want to talk about it.

So we are checking out and the guy keeps pushing things like if I sign up for the credit card I can save this much and if I give my due date I can get coupons and blah blah blah. Geeze. They are really pushing this stuff. Just let me have a normal experience and enjoy myself- I'm not trying to nickle and dime my way to a baby. It doesn't work that way. Needless to say, he is all confused when I don't want the credit card, the coupons or the two free issues of Parenting Magazine. He tells me the total like 8 times before he swipes my card and I'm thinking that I don't really care because I am not going to walk around naked when I outgrow my clothes, am I? Seriously.

So when we get home, Hunter tosses the bag of clothes on the bed and I look at it: "Motherhood Maternity- hot fashion, hot prices" This triggers the memory of other maternity store names hanging from the ceiling all over the store that I didn't seem to notice before. So I'm pretty sure I went to the second Ross of maternity clothes. Not the first Ross where everything is normal, but the Ross after the first Ross where all the reject clothes go that used to be $48 and are now $1.20. (That's a real example, by the way.) It was really difficult to find clothes that weren't weird. And I thought I just didn't know what I was doing. That may have been true, but next time I'll try a real store. At least I have pants that won't make me throw up.

Baby Names

So Hunter has picked out names for our quadruplet boys: Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo, and Raphael . And, of course, they will be color coordinated appropriately. Turtles in a half shell- turtle power! I just hope that if we end up having a boy he doesn't like he won't try to name him Shredder.

Meanwhile, back in reality, Hunter doesn't know of any girl names that he likes yet so we are going to go get a couple of books this weekend. Also, any girl name I like has already been taken or isn't appropriate. My all time favorite girl name is Lorelai which my cousin totally stole about six years ago when her daughter was born. How dare she. OK, so maybe she didn't know I loved that name and maybe I was 18 or 19 at the time so she wouldn't have cared anyway but the main focus here is that my second cousin is named that so I totally can't use it. I also like Xavier for a boy. Three things on that one: it's not a boy, Hunter hates it, and Hunter's little brother Austin absolutely loves it and has claims on it anyway. That will be the cutest little nephew: Xavier West. So great! I'm actually really excited he wants to use it so badly since I can't use it. Ha ha. But I also like Isabella and as much as I appear to be Hispanic I don't want her friends to tease her for having obviously white parents and a Latina name. So there ya go on that one. And finally, I love the name Elizabeth. But one of my best friends is named Elizabeth so end of discussion.

Suggestions so far on names....

Mikey Wetzel (friend from college who ironically had never tried Life cereal until we bought him some..and Mikey likes it, by the way) suggested Mikey for a boy and Mikea for a girl. Yeah, we'll think about those...

Sairy Sanchez (hermana and friend from college) suggested Sairy Sanchez West. But I didn't want her sister who I am equal friends with to feel left out so I suggested back Sairy Sianneth Sanchez West. That would totally make sense on all levels.

Someone else, I forget who but I think they are on our business team, suggested not naming it until it's like five like people did way back in the day because most kids didn't survive then. So when you figured it was going to stick life out, they finally named it. Also a good idea.

That's it for now although I am pretty sure I feel things happening around the baby which has got to be the oddest sensation ever. Maybe I am farther along than we thought...

Yup, I did that

I just spent two hours reorganizing the pantry. Yup, I did that. Also, I just ate the most delicious potato soup of my whole life. I would have more but I ate it all. The end.

Holy Holy Holy

Holy Holy Holy I'm really having a baby. WOW. And why does my house seem so dirty all of a sudden? Seriously. I can't keep it clean enough. No matter how much I vacuum, the carpet still feels gross. New carpet would be nice. But I don't think Hunter would let me do that every month. Also we have three pets who add to the messiness: a one year old chocolate lab named Bella, a three year old black, gray, white and brown striped cat named Majin (pronounced Maw-gin) and a two year old really fat orange cat named Kimba. Majin is the only one who has figured it out so far. He's the smart one.

We think Majin is the one who is going to be the most protective- but not scary protective like the bad version of the Terminator or anything...just an always-by-your-side kind of protection. Kimba is totally the princess of...the world probably. When we brought Bella home, Kimba was so not happy for about a month. Everytime we made eye contact with her she looked Asain. We are pretty sure her major thought was, "How dare you bring something into my house without my permission." So we think she might be a bit upset about a new human ruling her life. Bella is still a puppy so as long as she has something to chew on she's pretty much happy. Not sure what she is going to do so that should be interesting.

Totally unrelated but totally great: I remember watching Roseanne on Nick at Night in college and Dan had all of his old high school football buddies over for some sort of a reunion. They were all bragging about the most painful/crazy things they went through back in the day when Roseanne so gracefully entered the scene. She waits for a pause in the convo and says, "Well one time I went to the hospital and a few hours later, a human being came out of me."

Two lines = a baby

Thar she blows! The first realness of knowing I was pregnant...the second pink line is faint but don't underestimate her because I am still just as pregnant. So exciting! And I appologize if this is gross to anyone but I think it's beautiful so I posted it. :o) Also, if you are super curious like I totally would be, you can click on the pic for a huge view.

6 weeks?

So they tell me I am either 5 or 6 weeks as of last Thursday which means I go in in two weeks for my first sonogram (among other not so fun things) and to get a due date. But it will be born sometime in May or June. Also, I told Hunter that my feeling was it is a girl. Then he told me his feeling was it was a boy. Then he changed it to twin boys. Then quadruplet boys. Then I gave him a look and he changed it back to twin boys. We will find out eventually. Oh, and I am totally finding out the sex as soon as humanly possibly. I must know.

Side note: I am eating more than Hunter (which is ridiculous) and am single-handedly responsible for increasing our water bill because I am in the bathroom more than anywhere else. Insane. Plus everything is loud. And I can smell anything and everything and it all smells bad. I had no idea this all started so soon.

I feel wierd

Have you ever woken up in the morning and thought, "Hmmm. Something is growing inside of me."? It's a wierd thought. So Wednesday I was on the never ending conquest to rearrange things in our house and suddenly remembered that my monthly cleansing cycle (sorry, men but it happens) which was supposed to so gloriously start on Sunday had yet to rear it's head. That got me to thinking. Which made me realize I didn't remember last month's glory time. Interesting. So I took a home pregnancy test which turned out POSITIVE. Let me say that again: POSITIVE. Did you get a little dizzy? Because I sure did. Once my brain started functioning again I made an appointment at the OB/GYN for Thursday morning.

Thursday morning comes and I wake up about 85 times thinking I hear my alarm but somehow end up five minutes late for the appointment. As I'm waiting in extreme anticipation for the lady to call me back, a little baby in the waiting room starts screaming. Not sure how I feel about this. Finally they call me back but I haven't sucked down enough water to make a go at the test so I get to wait some more. Waiting is NOT my favorite. I'm sitting in the back waiting room furiously drinking water and trying to act normal (as if this is normal) wondering which way I want the test to swing. Finally I decide it's already done whatever it is and I try to focus my attention elsewhere. But that's not very easy considering women at every stage of pregnancy are constantly walking by me. Every time this happens I smile and think, "Don't mind me. I'm not even sure if I'm part of the club yet."

Finally I'm ready for the test, everything comes out fine and I leave the bathroom to venture for my second waiting room seat. As I walk out the bathroom door two things happened almost simultaneously: A very pregnant lady (I'm talking HUGE bump) walks in and closes the door just as my nurse walks around the corner to grab the delicious sample. So I get to wait some more. Holy cow. This is out of control. The pregnant lady finally emerges from the bathroom and my nurse grabs the sample. Well, probably not "grabs" because that would have very wet results. Ick.

Eventually my nurse comes around the corner with a "Yep, you are deffinately pregnant." Wow. Not a, "Guess what?!" or even a, "You are pregnant." but slaps on a big 'ole "deffinately". Somehow this makes it seem more solidified. But I guess if I am going to be pregnant I might as well "deffinately" be.